An early slasher classic

A Bay of Blood (1971)

Even though the influences of the genre come from even older movies, this one is probably the first true slasher film which fits the genre completely. Sure this film by Mario Bava is missing the masked murderer but the similarities for example to Friday the 13th (1980) are quite clear. Last time I saw this about 15 years ago I couldn't really understand much from it, the VHS had a horrible audio track and no subtitles, so all I could understand was that some people were getting killed and that of course didn't impress me much back then. Now luckily the DVD by Future Film has nice audio with subtitles and the image quality is good as well. But I must say I still didn't really understand everything. Now sure I understood the motives and the plot, but at points I was quite lost with who's killing who. The movie jumps timelines and there are multiple killers (not a spoiler, so don't worry) so I got lost quite a many times. Anyway that didn't matter much as there's a nice giallo-like atmosphere and plenty of quite graphic kills which kept me entertained. At points the soundtrack by Stelvio Cipriani sounded great, but unfortunately most of the time it was rather dull. The ending is just something special, shocking and absolutely hilarious in a dark sense of humour and that alone is worth watching the whole movie. As a curiosity piece for seeing the baby steps of the slasher genre this is pure brilliance and as a fun late night shocker this works quite well even today, despite the few flaws.
73%

A little giallo gem

 The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh (1971)

Well if the last six movies from the Shameless collection were not that great, this movie pretty much makes up for all of them. This movie by Sergio Martino is among the best giallos I've seen. Life is not easy for Julie Wardh (Edwige Fenech), she is troubled by nightmares of her violent ex-lover Jean (Ivan Rassimov) and one day Jean returns to haunt her. While her husband Neil (Alberto de Mendoza) seems to never be around a lover, George (George Hilton), steps into her life, but when Neil returns things become even more complicated. Amongst this mess of relationships there is a serial killer on the loose and it seems the killer is also after Jean. Sure as in many giallos the story isn't this movie's strongest point, but in this one it's surprisingly intriguing. That even despite the multiple twists at the end which almost turned into comedy in their out of the blue way of pulling the rug under the feet of the viewer. But like in most giallos, the style and atmosphere make up for what the story might be lacking. The cinematography in this one is pure brilliance and very diverse, even amongst other giallos. That in addition of the great music by Nora Orlandi, which was a surprisingly strong effort from her, makes this one a true beauty. And then there's Edwige Fenech. Probably the best giallo actress in the whole genre and certainly the most pleasing for the eyes. The rest of the cast wasn't bad either and somewhat surprisingly for the genre there were even some great performances in this one. For every giallo fan this is a must see as it's one of the best in the genre.
98%

Childhood traumas can be released by breaking a mirror

 










 The Boogeyman (1980)

Ulli Lommel is like the poor man's Uwe Boll, both of them do horrible movies but where Boll occasionally manages to get some big names in his projects Lommel seemingly uses people he finds from the street. This one here is one of his better movies and seeing how bad this one was you get the idea what the rest of them are. As a young girl Lacey sees her brother murder the seemingly violent boyfriend of their mother. Years later the "ghost" of that boyfriend comes back to seek revenge. The idea is that as the murder was witnessed through a mirror the soul of the victim got trapped inside it and years later Lacey breaks the mirror and the evil soul is set free, or something like that. I honestly didn't even care as the movie had already alienated me far enough to not give a shit about the plot. But that's part of the beauty of this movie, it really is so bad it starts being good. I haven't laughed this hard in a long time at a horror movie which at least seemingly tries to be serious. Pretty much every time someone gets killed it's funny in one way or another. Simply hilariously horrible. The effects are bad, the acting is horrible, the story is insane and the music is annoyingly loud. And yet it was quite entertaining. I didn't like the letterboxing on the DVD print, but I must say some of the shots in this one looked surprisingly good. Also need to give some props for the attempt to build suspense rather than just going for the gore shocks. So there was some effort in there as well, but too bad it's wasted with all the other nonsense. As a horror movie it's bad, as a trashy fun flick it was quite ok.
65%

Jason Voorhees - The man behind the mask part 1

It's friday the 13th and time for a bit of a tribute. I actually waited a bit to post these reviews as I noticed that the date was coming up. So call me crazy, but I decided to watch all of the Friday the 13th movies again as I saw this documentary called His Name Was Jason: 30 Years of Friday the 13th (2009). Most people have their favourite horror icon, wether it's Freddy Krueger from The Nightmare on Elm Street or Michael Myers from Halloween or Pinhead from Hellraiser or maybe Jigsaw from the Saw series. Mine has always been Jason Voorhees from the Friday the 13th series. There's just something about that unstoppable killing machine in a hockey mask that I like. I know it's not exactly an original choice as he is pretty much the grand master of slasher icons. Kind of like the Wayne Gretzky of horror (no pun intended). Not that the other guys wouldn't be all star players as well, but no matter how you measure it Jason takes the win in every category. For example sequels and remakes, Halloween has 7 sequels and 2 remakes, Hellraiser has 8 sequels and a remake is about to be released soon, Nightmare on Elm Street has 7 sequels and one remake and Saw has 6 sequels. Friday the 13th has 10 sequels and one remake. How about the all important body count? Freddy Kruger has a pitiful 45 throughout his films, Jigsaw is doing fairly well with 77 in only so few movies and Michael Myers has a respectable 111. Jason has a record breaking 161 throughout his films and actually if you add to that the other kills in the series done by his mother or impersonators it's close to a staggering 200. Jason has also been to the future, he's been in hell and he actually kicked Freddy's ass, not to mention he has even been in a talk show. So he is the biggest of them all, no matter how you see it. But are the movies any good? In the early 90's when I found this franchise I really loved them, but I was around 15 then so eventually I did get bored of them and except for the first part and Freddy vs. Jason, I haven't watched any of them since. I have a feeling I'm going to be very disappointed and ruin my good memories of them by doing this, but I want to see how they work today. So here's the whole story of Jason Vorhees.



Friday the 13th (1980)

Well this is one of the movies that started the modern slasher genre, even though you could argue that the genre had already been started, but never the less this surely helped to boost it to new heights. Not much to say about the plot, group of young people go to a summer camp to get it ready for the kids coming in a few weeks. They hear stories how the camp had a bloody history and soon enough they start to die one by one. You don't have to wait for the first kill too long as it comes before 5 minutes is up. A crew member Willie Adams playing a counsellor is the lucky man to be the first to die in this franchise and his girlfriend follows him right after, so two down and around 196 to go. I must say the plot wasn't as bad as I remembered it to be, there was some effort to it, though of course these movies aren't made because of the plot. Sure the dialog was corny at parts and towards the end the actions the heroine takes are quite idiotic, but I've seen a lot worse also. Another thing about the end, all respect to Betsy Palmer, but I found it quite unfitting that the killer who chops up quite a few people with ease before can't handle one girl and looks to be fighting like an old lady. The t&a (tits and/or ass) department was surprisingly lacking as I counted only two scenes, something hopefully the later parts will fix. The kills however are quite spectacular, Tom Savini's effects are a work of art and this movie has some of the best he has ever made. My favourite by far being the scene where Kevin Bacon gets an arrow through his throat. The music sounded like a ripoff from Jaws (1975) and Psycho (1960), but I guess that was intentional kind of like a message to the viewer that there's something more horrifying coming. Anyway I liked this quite a bit even though the main man with the hockey mask wasn't in it and I must say it was surprisingly entertaining. I watched the fully uncut Blu-Ray version of it, actually if I remember correctly this is the only part where there is an uncut version available. The MPAA didn't go easy on the sequels and sort of targeted the franchise with a lot tighter rules than others of it's kind. Don't know why, but I guess someone pissed someone off or something, not like the MPAA has ever been biased about anything before either so who knows. Another thing about the Blu-Ray, because the picture quality was quite great, it showed some mistakes quite badly. Some on the makeup, but most notably in the final scare where you can clearly see some twig moving behind the boat. Also was quite funny to actually see the numbers on the dices on that strip Monopoly, hard not to laugh when the girl throws one and two but still says double sixes. But those little things just add to the magic of the movie and this classic can stand a lot of fun making without losing it's charm.
75%



Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)

Five years after the first part they open another camp next door to Crystal Lake where again a group of young people gather to learn the ropes of being a counselor. Of course again they start to get killed one at a time and the myth of a guy named Jason roaming around the woods killing people starts to come into reality. I didn't like the flashback sequence at the start where they recap the first part in a dream by none other but the sole survivor of the first part. Tends to drag the start for way too long and actually we have to wait almost 12 minutes before Alice gets an ice pick in her head. That's a whole lot longer than in the first part, though if you don't count the flashbacks then it's a lot closer to it. Anyway, as the sequel is supposed to bring things to a new level, this really didn't. I mean sure now we finally have Jason killing the teenagers, but other than that this movie walked pretty much the same path as the first one, not even trying to top it. Didn't count but the bodycount seemed quite similar as well. The kill scenes are quite mild, thanks to MPAA, so didn't top the first one in those either. The t&a was a slight improvement, but still nothing to rave about. My favourite kill was the double impalement, but the wheelchair kill was quite great also as it was just so wrong in so many levels. I must say that towards the end Jason turns into the unluckiest guy on the planet, nothing seems to go right when he tries to let Ginny out of her misery. That unfortunately brought unneeded comedy into it and made it more campy than it should have been. I mean of course you can't watch these with a straight face, but still some sense would be welcome. Loved the dog bit at the end though, almost as good as the ending of the first part. So all in all, even though this movie has a couple of good scenes and that it set the tone for Jason hunting teenagers, this is still a bad sequel as it really doesn't even try to top the first part.
42%



Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982)

This movie should be called Saturday the 14th or Sunday the 15th as it continues right where the second part left, so that would be saturday, though the majority of it happens on the day after that, so sunday. But then again who cares, another group of teenagers are gathered near the lake and Jason is out to get them. Again the movie starts out with a flasback from the second part and again it's quite tedious as I just watched it, don't really need to be reminded about what happened there. Then again as all of these were done a year apart from eachother and as the home video hadn't exploded yet, I kind of understand the point of recapping the previous part at the start. But then again as the story in these is very thin, they could have just as well left it out and it would have worked just as good. Anyway, this movie was done in 3D to bring a new element to it and I must say it was quite painful. I mean I didn't watch the 3D version of it, but everything, and I really mean everything, is slapped on the camera as a gimmick to tease the audience and it really gets annoying after a while. So was it any better than the second part? We have to wait over 15 minutes for the first kill, way too long. But then again the kills are quite good in this one, a definite improvement from the second part. And even though the MPAA did rape this one as well, it's not as bad as the second one so there's some proper gore in it also. The best kill was the machete swing at the guy walking with his hands, though the head crushing in all of it's goofiness was quite nice as well. The t&a department is the weakest of the three, which was a definite let down. But what's most notable in this one is that Jason finally gets his iconic hockey mask, thanks to a nerdy guy called Shelly who brought it to the lake. Though there is no great moment of putting the mask on for the first time, Jason just walks into the scene wearing it, but none the less you could call that a historical moment. The end fight is quite idiotic again, Jason seems to have huge strenght when he's killing other people but when the heroine needs to get away he seems to be as weak as a little girl. I mean he can crush a man's head with bare hands but can't choke a woman or snap her neck. Anyway, even though the t&a was a major let down, I liked this more than the second part.
53%



Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)

This again continues right where the last one left so now we're going on Monday the 16th, but again it really doesn't matter. Another group of teenagers go to the lake while Jason wakes up in the morgue and off we go again. True to the tradition, again we get a flashback at the start setting up the story. Luckily this time it's a bit shorter and full of kills from the previous movies so I didn't mind that much. We have to wait for the first kill about 14 mins (not counting the flashbacks), so they are not breaking any records here, but then again it's a very good one so it was worth the wait. Tom Savini returns to make the effects for this part and they are a beauty, even though MPAA vandalised them again. Luckily there are a few glimpses of them left so all the work didn't go to waste. Funny that the reason why he returned was that he wanted to kill the character he built, little did he know that the series was still in the beginning at this point. The biggest improvement to the previous parts is in the t&a department which are plenty, so that was a nice surprise. There's also quite a bit of comedy in it and I mean intentional, unintentional there's of course in every part. For example it has one of the funniest dance scenes I've seen. Best kill by far is Jason's "death", but then again as he didn't really die I guess that doesn't count. Other than that, the "where's the cork screw?" scene cracked me up even though it wasn't that special otherways, though maybe the first kill was the best after all. This didn't have the most original kills of the series, though they are not bad either, mostly thanks to Tom Savini. The biggest surprise however was the end fight, I mean sure it also had it's idiotic moments where the victims make stupid actions but still it was very effective and managed to even raise some tension. So it's definitely better than the last two and managed to be quite entertaining.
60%



Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985)

So after the final chapter where Jason gets chopped to pieces you of course go for the new beginning. The movie starts off great when Tommy, the kid from the last part, is watching in the bushes when two drunken guys dig up Jason's body and of course he jumps to life and kills them. We get the first kill before 4 minutes, a record so far. But that was all just a dream. Tommy is now grown up and been to all sorts of mental institutions. Jason seems to haunt him in flashbacks and soon enough people start dying. I'm a bit puzzled about the timeline right about now. I mean the first part was set in 1979, the second part was set 5 years later so that would make it 1984 as would the third and the fourth as they are direct continuation. Now this is set 10 years after the fourth part so that would make it 1994, at least according to my math skills. Still the movie looks quite like 1985. Then again maybe those country folk don't really stay too current on the latest trends. Well anyways lets not get caught up in small things as there's plenty of good fun in this one. First of all the t&a is well in order, especially the "It's showtime!" bit was a joy. Also the appropriately named Debi Sue Voorhees was a sight for sore eyes. Second thing I liked were the innovative kills, though again the MPAA has spoiled the fun quite efficiently. Very hard to pick the best as there's so many good ones. The flare to the mouth scene, belt around the tree, garden scissors to the head or the crapper impalement were all quite nice. There's plenty of unintentional comedy but also some intentional that works somewhat ok. Loved the two crazy hillbillies. Even the ending looked to be nicely over the top with the tractor and all. But then they piss it all away. First time I saw this I was so angry about the ending that I ranked this as the worst piece of crap this franchise has. I still didn't like the fact that Jason is not the killer, but then again he isn't in the first part either so I didn't take it too seriously this time. For sure this movie is a bad movie for the fans of the series, but for everyone looking for a campy fun slasher, this was actually quite ok. But as I'm a Jason fan I'm going to rate it with that.
35%



Jason Lives: Friday the 13th Part VI (1986)

After the ridiculous copycat nonsense we're back in business with the real thing. This time there's no flashback at the start, but we hear voices from the fourth part as Tommy and his friend are digging up Jason to burn his body. Which I found quite odd as the mayor said in the last part that Jason was cremated, oh well little things don't matter as it still looks like the 80's while the timeline should be somewhere around 1997 if you count the years. Anyway, Tommy's plan to burn Jason ends up going wrong and he actually helps to resurrect Jason by impaling his body with an iron pole which gets hit by a lightning giving Jason one hell of a jump start. First kill happens a bit after 8 minutes as Tommy's friend who didn't even want to dig the body up in the first place gets to pay the price of that mistake. Tommy escapes and Jason is out for blood again. It seems that Crystal Lake has been a great camp site because they have renamed it and yes there's another summer camp for kids in there and more importantly another batch of counselors to be cut to pieces. This part finally gets what's important in these movies, it's not the teens, it's Jason and the movie focuses more on him leaving the teens to be what they are, meat for the grinder. Sure there are the "lead" characters of Tommy and Megan, the sherif's daughter, but the real star of the show is the man with the hockey mask. The "Bond" start was pure brilliance and they clearly made Jason more like a super hero, or maybe a villain in this case but it's debatable. Hell the undead, unstoppable killing machine even has a utility belt with all sorts of cool pointy things to slay the teenagers, very convinient. Just like the last part this one also has lots of comedy in it, some bad, some quite ok. But the biggest problem this one had was that there's no t&a at all, not even a glimpse! That's a shame as this part had erything else so well in hand. The kills are quite great and again there are too many good one's to pick the best. The metal pole swing scene, taking the machete with a hand in it, the head to the Winnebago wall scene and folding the sherif in half in a very painful manner were all quite great. Also the music was great, Alice Cooper was my childhood hero so can't go wrong with that. I enjoyed this part probably the most out of the sequels thus far, it's focusing on the main thing and filling the gaps with somewhat ok humour. Too bad the t&a was a let down as this could have been quite brilliant.
69%

Jason Voorhees - The man behind the mask part 2

Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988)

Passed the half way marker on the series and I still haven't lost my sanity, that's a great thing I guess. But damn, the timeline goes absolutely crazy in this one. I mean it was around 1997 when Jason ended in the bottom of the lake and in this one Jason was already in the lake when Tina was a little girl so that adds at least 12 years to it again when Tina is grown up and this story begins. So that would mean this movie is supposed to take place in around 2009. Well didn't see any cellphones or ipods or digital cameras or anything like that, just the usual 80's stuff. Either those country folk are really behind in development or I should just stop trying to figure out the timeline. Anyway this part goes back to traditions with a flashback start, though this time there's a new narration to it. The plot in this one is that a young woman, Tina, with telekinetic powers comes to the lake with her mother and doctor in order to get her powers in control. Of course on the next door there's a group of teens hosting a surprise birthday party so that's a definite check on the fresh meat. Tina ends up resurrecting Jason with her powers and the killing starts again. We get the first kill already at around 7 mins, but it's not Jason who does it. Jason's first kill comes at around 20 minutes, that's the slowest thus far from the parts where Jason is actually doing the killing. But once he gets started he's not wasting any time, so it's not a big problem. Again there's plenty of good kills, but the best is the sleeping bag slam. Brutal. Though I really liked the skinny dipping kill also but for a very different reason. Speaking of that, the t&a department is back in order again which was a big plus. The story borrows quite a many themes from Carrie (1976) and of course goes totally over board with the powers, but I still quite liked it. The movie was cut to a torso by the damn MPAA, so many of the quite innovative kills are mere flashes on the screen and it seems very mild in modern standards. This movie is also remarkable because it's the first movie with Kane Hodder as Jason, who of course is the most known actor to play Jason and ended up reprising his role in the following movies as well. I must say this was actually even more entertaining than the first part and turned out to be my favourite thus far. It doesn't try to be funny, but it doesn't take itself seriously either, so when ever it goes to the unintentional comedy it actually works quite well, just like a no brainer slasher flick should.
77%



Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989)

The story continues where the last one left, Jason is at the bottom of Crystal Lake and a boat anchor cracks a power line which jump starts him again. There's not exactly a flashback in the start but the guy in the boat recaps the past events to his girfriend, and he was even kind enough to bring a new hockey mask for Jason. So of course they end up dead and Jason takes a swim to a nearby cruise ship where a group of teenagers are heading for New York. The title is actually quite misleading as only a very small part of the movie happens in New York, it's mostly on the ship, at the docks, back streets and sewers which could be from what ever city. This part was a major let down, only thing it had right was the t&a, but even those were quite few and far between. We actually get tits before the first kill which also happens a bit late at around 10 minutes. I didn't like the look of the movie, it was too dark and dirty. That would have fit it well if the director would have even tried to build some suspense, but as he goes only for the gore effect (which of course got cut out by MPAA) it fails quite miserably. The timeline of course gets even weirder, but even though I decided to not care about it as they clearly just ignore the previous sequels, it still made an idiotic turn on it. I mean Rennie, the heroine of the story, was supposedly getting drowned by Jason as a little kid, well that all fine, but Rennie is 20-something and Jason drowned in the 50's. She sure looks young for a 45 year old. Anyway that's not even the most idiotic thing about this movie, the ending is just something colossal in stupidity. And saying that for this series where the stories are quite far from smart is something special. Also what the hell is up with Jason's teleportation skills? I mean immortality and super human strenght I can take but that's just too much even for me. Crappy movie and even the kills weren't anything worth watching. For the best kill, as a Finn the sauna kill warmed my heart, though I did like the boxing kill in it's goofiness also. But other than that, there's nothing to see.
28%



Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

First there was The Final Chapter and now it's The Final Friday with Jason going to hell. Don't they ever learn this series will never die? Anyhow the biggest question with this was what New Line was going to do with the franchise after buying it from Paramount. The movie starts up great, we get some nice suspense, a very nice shower scene and most of all Jason is back (and not as a fucking kid like in the last part). But then it all goes to hell. Jason gets blown to pieces and we get this nonsense about his soul or what ever switching between bodies as hosts. Then there's some killing and even more idiotic plot about Jason having a sister who is the only one who can kill him. Horrible excuse for a Friday the 13th movie as this has very little to do with it. People want to see Jason killing teenagers in his hockey mask, not some Body Snatchers ripoff. There is some fine t&a which was well needed as there's really not much else to look for. The first kill was probably the slowest of the series at just before 17 minutes. Best kill was by far the safe sex kill, which in a real Friday the 13th movie would have been one of the best in the series but in this it's just a waste of a good idea. This was the second fully uncut movie in this series thus far, but that didn't really help much as the kills aren't that great, apart from that safe sex bit. This was a crappy waste of time and money.
17%



Jason X (2001)

The last part ended up in a scene which set up the idea of a duel between Freddy and Jason, but for some reason they decided to send him into space instead. So the story goes something like this, Jason gets cryogenically frozen and his icicle is found 450 years later when Earth has become uninhabitable. He is taken to a space ship and defrozen, and of course the killing starts again. I didn't really like this part, the whole idea of taking him into the future was a bit too silly and felt like a desperate attempt to bring new life to the series. Jason belongs to the countryside, not to a space ship. Anyway, what I liked was that the body skipping bullshit was abandoned and it's the main man himself doing the killing again. And there are some quite good ones in this part. We get the first kill around 6 minutes so it surely doesn't waste time and the body count is quite high, actually if you count in the whole space station he indirectly destroys it's more than in the whole series alltogether. Best kill was the frozen face slam, though the guy spinning in the drill was also fun. Even though there's a lot of sex scenes and sexual references, there's not really any t&a. One set of fake robo-tits and two pairs of hologram simulated titties, so very weak in that department. I didn't mind that they took a comedic approach to the series, other parts did that as well, but the comedy in this one is a bit too idiotic. The SuperJason was just retarded, sure it made me smile but it was so unnecessary. This part was way better than the previous, but still far from the better ones from this series.
36%



Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

The fans had been awaiting for this movie since the 80's and after being disappointed that the previous movie wasn't what part 9 promised, they surely were anxious to see this one. And I must say I was also. I mean I had long before lost interest in the Nightmare on Elm Street movies as apart from the good first part they are very bad, but still to see Jason and Freddy fight it out in one movie sounded great. Freddy is pissed as no one seems to remember him and thus he has no one to kill, so he decides to call in some help. He appears in Jason's dream and convinces him to go to Elm Street to do some killing. So Jason takes a little trip and sure enough bodies start to pile up and the first suspect is Freddy as the older people in the town haven't forgotten him. But then Freddy has another problem, Jason is an unstoppable killing machine that cuts through the teens in such a speed that he can't get a kill in between. So Freddy needs to stop Jason so he can have the kids to himself and the battle is on. I actually like this movie, it's very entertaining and doesn't take itself too seriously. There's also enough t&a to keep things going and surely no shortage of kills. We get the first kill already around 5 mins, but it turns out to be a dream. The first "real" kill is around 13 mins and it's also one of the best kills in the whole series. I liked how the story tried to stay true to both of the franchises and at least I interpreted the ending that Jason won. At least he won the bodycount as Freddy manages to get only one kill in the whole movie. Sure it had it's flaws with some stupid dialog and idiotic actions that the characters make, also the acting was quite far from great. Anyway, this was a surprisingly good spinoff, very entertaining and fun, just what it's supposed to be.
73%



Friday the 13th (2009)

After Jason had been to space, hell and the future among other things it has become time to reboot the series. I actually don't know why, it's not like the other sequels were that loyal to eachother anyways or that the origin story was worth telling again, so they could have just taken Jason and slap him where ever they want and have a guy recap the past in a few sentences like before. At least I would have been perfectly happy with that. But they went for the remake which got me worried. I hadn't seen this before now as even though it had some interesting people working on it I thought it would still end up pissing on the horror icon. Marcus Nispel did a surprisingly good remake, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003), so I thought he was quite a good choice to helm this reboot. Also it's written by the same lot that did the previous which I enjoyed quite a bit. But enough about that and on with the movie. I kind of liked the fact that they compacted the first three parts into one, we see the mother, Jason with a potato sack on his head and the legendary hockey mask. Then again that raised the question why is this a remake as it mostly focuses on the adult Jason slaying teenagers it could have just as well been part 12 as far as the story goes. I also liked the fact that they kept the horror as horror and the comedy was in between the killing, I mean it was nice for a change that they didn't make fun of Jason. The movie doesn't waste time getting the first kill as it's in the first 3 minutes into the film, but it's not Jason doing the killing. We have to wait a bit over 12 minutes for the first kill by Jason, but then again there's plenty of them so it didn't matter at all. Best kill by far was the machete to the head at the pier, one of the best in the whole series. There was enough of t&a also, so everything could have been in order, but it really wasn't. I mean now that I've seen all the parts back to back I've of course formed a view of who Jason is and this movie didn't really fit into it. First of all Jason doesn't torture people, he kills them, I mean he's a very efficient guy so when he comes at you with a machete he will chop you up, not set up some sleeping bag barbeque. Also he doesn't kidnap people, he just kills them, especially anyone who tries to impersonate his mother. Nor does he collect bodies, the only body he keeps is his mother's, the rest he buries into the woods or leaves out in display for the teens to get scared of. This new "personal" Jason felt like the director had mixed the characters from his previous remake as this wasn't the Jason we've seen before. Had there not been the hockey mask this could have just as well been another part of Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I also hated the corny product placement ala Michael Bay, at least in the previous movies they were power tools or some other gadgets used to kill people, not just to market a beer brand or something like that. Anyway the movie was still somewhat entertaining modern day slasher with all the cliches it brings with it, too bad it was called Friday the 13th as it kind of missed the essence of this series.
38%



His Name Was Jason: 30 Years of Friday the 13th (2009)

This 90 minute documentary hosted by Tom Savini goes through all 12 parts of the franchise. Right from the start it's obvious that the fans of the franchise will get the most out of this as I kind of doubt that there is anyone out there that would watch a documentary like this without knowing what's it about. And those who know what's it about either like the franchise and watch this or hate it and pass this one. So that being said I was a bit disappointed that it also tried to fish in new fans going through the obvious stuff everyone who has seen even one of the movies already knows. But luckily there are quite a bit of interesting info as well, some of which even I didn't know about even though in the early 90's I wore out the tapes and digged up every bit of info I could get. The interviews are great and they have really dug up pretty much everyone who was anyone in the series. There's all the directors, all the guys who played Jason, many actors from each part and lots of horror fans who all give out their take on the series. It's fairly well made and luckily they got to show clips from each part as I think some of them are from different production companies so it must have been a hassle to get the rights. Even though Tom Savini does a good job hosting it, I felt that the theme park thingy was a bit out of place and felt a bit too corny. Also it was funny that he was hosting in character but he was also being interviewed from the effects while being himself, so it looked a bit goofy. Anyway, fans will get at least something out of this, even though it's not the best it could have been.
68%


So, 12 movies and one document later I think I still have my sanity. And further more I still think Jason is the ultimate slasher icon. What makes him different from his colleagues is his efficiency he has in his work and the fact that he kills without any pleasure of killing, it's just an action for him. While Freddy, Pinhead and Jigsaw toy around with their victims getting pleasure from the thrill of the kill or feeding from their fear, Jason just gets the job done without any fancy bullshit. He's a working class mass murderer that doesn't put up a show, he just gets the job done and there's something you got to adore in that mentality. Michael Myers is actually quite similar to Jason, but I guess it's the woods and the hockey mask that ultimately makes Jason better.

Death brings out the worst side of everyone

Dementia 13 (1963)

I noticed that there's quite a many Francis Ford Coppola's pictures which I haven't seen yet or seen so long ago I couldn't really remember anything about them. So I decided to start with the first movie Coppola ever made. Louise's husband suffers a fatal heart attack while they are on a midnight boat ride. But Louise has another problem in addition to the body in her hands, she can't get a penny of the big family inheritance if his husband is dead and the lady with all the money is alive. So she convinces the family that her husband had to go on a business trip while she travels to Ireland to see how she could help the early demise of the lady with all the money. Soon however an axe murderer is lose in the Irish mansion and someone seems to have plans of their own to cut down the possible persons in the line of the inheritance. This is actually an early slasher film, but it's not just axe murders and people running scared around the mansion. It's also a proper psychological thriller that's even quite scary at parts. Sure some of the scenes were almost direct ripoffs from Hitchcock, but still Coppola manages to get his own touch in there as well. The low budget and the extremely tight shooting schedule shows quite badly as there are tons of mistakes and a fair share of not that good acting. This is a very good effort as a first movie and was well worth watching despite its flaws.
68%

A whole lot of Screams

I went to see Scream 4 (2011) couple of days ago and wrote the review of it, but when I was thinking about the other parts I actually didn't remember what happened in which part. And as I remembered at least two of them being somewhat good, I though it's time to check them out again as well.



Scream (1996)

I must say I quite liked this movie when it came out, it was a well needed breath of fresh air to the slasher genre. But right from the first time I saw it I knew it's not going to hold multiple viewings. The whole concept of making fun of other slasher movies while working around the cliches of them and the end twist felt like a trick that works only once. I mean you can only trick the slasher fans once into thinking you have a superior movie than any other slasher out there. Sure enough the second time I saw it, it didn't work nearly as well as the first time but I still remember enjoying it. So now I gave it a third try after more than 10 years. Well I really didn't enjoy it that much this time around, there were quite a few very bad moments that actually made me think why the hell did I ever liked this movie. First the things I liked about it. I like the way it doesn't try to hide who the killer is, but still offers quite a few other suspects as well and gives alibis to the ones you think are the killer. I remember when I first saw this that I guessed the killer right from the first scene we see him, the romantic version of Don't Fear the Reaper gave it away for me, but then he gets put into jail so that didn't work. I also liked the suspension building in some of the scenes. Even though the movie resorted into cheap scares quite often it still did take some time to get proper suspension also. Also I quite liked the mood of the movie, it's very easy going and even fun at times, but still it manages to be scary when needed. What I didn't like was the fact that it tries to convince you that it knows every trick in the slasher movie handbook and yet it falls into quite a many cliches itself. I mean sure it worked the first time, you give the audience a few scenes they didn't expect and they will let some nonsense pass as well, but on the second time it just doesn't work. When you build tension with a character that's being stalked, the character's actions are the key into the suspension, if the character does something stupid that you wouldn't do it spoils the whole suspension for you. After that you turn to the killer's side, kind of like "oh fuck this shit, kill that stupid bitch already and get this over with." And to be honest there weren't many wise characters in this movie. Speaking of characters I absolutely hated Deputy Dewey this time, thought he was funny but yet somehow heroic character first time I saw this, now I noticed he's stupid as a boot and way too goofy. Actually his quest to get into Gale Weather's undies ends up getting a guy killed, another thing I didn't notice first time around. And to be honest the whole ending after that was quite idiotic. I got the feeling that the writer had a great idea on the motives of the killer and the whole plot, but didn't know how to break it down to the viewer. So he decided to put this cliched ridiculous ending where the killer explains the motives and stupidly enough demonstrates what's coming after it's all done even though it's not yet done. How fucking retarted can someone be that when he/she has the situation under control and the last victim ready to die, he/she decides to stab him/herself first to get the alibi part out of the way and thus giving the victim a chance to escape. So the ending sucked big time. But despite it being quite a bad movie on the third watch I'd still recommend it to anyone who hasn't seen it yet as it does have it's moments on the first viewing. And I do have to give it some credit as it really had it's impact on the whole horror genre, maybe not the best impact, but still way better than for example what the Saw series had.
61%



Scream 2 (1997)

So of course as the movie was so popular the one trick gimmick got a sequel and thus kind of watered down the first part by doing so. This time it's the horror movie sequels that are being made fun of while the movie itself of course uses many of those cliches. All the survivors of the first part return and of course there's a copycat who wants to finish what the first part couldn't do. The recipe is the same, make the audience think the movie is on the "next level" of slashers by making fun of the cliches and then use the other cliches to ride past the unaware viewer. And sure it works once but as at this point it has been done before the viewer isn't tricked as easily. Too bad it doesn't try to fix the problems of the first part, only use the same idea with another story in it. What I liked about this movie was the soundtrack, some of the comedy and again some of the suspension building. What I didn't like was again the stupid over explaining killer. Once more he/she had the thing all wrapped up but of course he/she needs to tell his/her life story before finishing it. Idiotic. Though I did like the first motive of the killer quite a bit and actually that would have been an interesting dilemma to go into a bit deeper. It's a shame it's only covered breafly in the end and then just forgot. Another thing I found quite idiotic was the whole car sequence, I mean how stupid can the women be and really how stupid do the film makers think the audience is. As that wouldn't have been enough it's followed by a scene where the movie takes exactly the same routes it made fun of in the first part, stupid beyond belief. At this point I had to struggle to keep watching as that many idiotic scenes in a movie that wants you to believe it's a smart slasher is just ridiculous. So the first half was quite ok, despite some bad acting and horribly corny dialog, but the second half is just colossal in stupidity. So in the end the movie falls to the same problem it makes fun of, failing to fix the problems of the first part and just focusing in giving the viewer more of what the first one had without even trying to bring anything new to the table.
33%



Scream 3 (2000)

I remember the first time I saw this I didn't have my hopes up and it still ended up dissapointing me. So wasn't surely expecting much this time around either. Surely enough it was still a bad movie. The only thing I liked about this was to try and guess who the killer is and how nicely false leads are given to the viewer. Other than that this was just garbage. Survivors of the second part of course return and the rest of the cast is filled with stock actors doing performances from bad to absolutely horrible. Sure again there are cameos of some familiar faces but they didn't really help. And yet again the dialog at times was simply awful. The worst thing was that it again completely forgot what it was trying to teach in the previous films. It seemed that everyone in the movie was about as dumb as a rubber boot. "You take the gun and go look that way, I'll go unarmed this way so the killer can get me first." I mean it surely doesn't take a genius to write a believable stalk scene, but please don't let braindead retards have a shot at it, ok? Had to really struggle to get through this, so luckily the guessing game worked somewhat great, but a good movie that doesn't make.
20%



Scream 4 (2011)

After almost 11 years they try to revive the series that made slasher movies popular again. So is it just a bad attempt to cash in with the old formula or do they actually have something new to the genre? Well it was bit of both, but unfortunately more on the first part. The beginning was quite nice with it's funny movie within a movie within another movie trick, though as "layers" are the hot thing in movies today that was kind of predictable. None the less it kicked off the movie quite nicely. The old cast of course return and then there's the fresh meat for the grinder. That's actually one of the biggest problem with this series, the three characters from all of the parts just won't die so you just don't fear for them anymore. Though that "immortality" was used quite nicely in this one with a bit of a moral dilemma that what's the point of surviving if all your loved ones always end up dead. But for some reason the movie just states that once and never really goes into it any deeper. In my opinion they should have killed them all right from the start and get a fresh cast to the new "revision", at least that would have made it clear that all bets are really off. Now you can basically figure out who's going to die and who's not right from the start. That being said the movie almost took an unexpected turn with the main three characters, but then again it didn't dare to go with it. This part actually had learned a bit from the mistakes of the first three and didn't always go for the cliched route after making fun of it first, but still it wasn't really innovative either. Actually before the "first ending" this movie was on it's way of being a very good and quite fresh new look on the slasher genre. But why the hell in this part as well the motives need to be discussed in long dialogs before the job is done? Is it really the only way to tell them to the viewer or were the writers just lazy and borrowed the formula from the previous films? I actually really liked the motives, they fit the modern day problems very well, but despised the way they were told. That being said I thought the movie took a very good turn after the motives dialogs, but too bad again they got scared to really go that way and the "second ending" watered the movie down all together right to that category of cash in with an easy concept. That's a shame as the movie had it's moments and at parts really looked like it would go to a different direction, but unfortunately it ended up in the same slot as the previous ones. For fans of the series this is well worth watching, but the rest might not enjoy it that much.
58%


After watching all four of them I must say I'm quite surprised how bad they were. I mean sure the first and the fourth were ok, but I remembered the first and the second being a lot better. But I guess that's how it goes, times change and things don't work as good anymore as they used to. But I must say I agree to what they say in the fourth part, I'd watch any of these movies over another gorno movie (gore porno or torture porn) like from the Saw series for example. And that just shows in how bad shape the "big" horror movies are today.

This torso is a full grown slasher thriller

Torso (1973)

Someone is murdering young college girls in Rome and a woman recalls she might have seen the suspect. She travels to the countryside with three of her friends, but the murderer follows them there. There's no shortage of nudity or blood and guts in this one so the entertainment values are well in hand. The story however is a bit ridiculous, but to be honest it doesn't really matter that much. The cast is quite beautiful, acting however could have been a bit better at parts. The style is quite straight forward at the start with only a few somewhat great scenes, but towards the end around the last 15 minutes or so there's some proper tension building. And that end is really worth the whole movie, there's really not much dialog and mostly just the killer and a victim but the way it's built is something well worth seeing. Takes the thriller on levels that even Hitchcock would have been proud. But getting there might not be easy if you are looking forward to a scary thriller. The beginning is a sleazy fun slasher and luckily quite fast paced so you won't get bored. The score didn't really strike that special, though it wasn't bad either. Same goes for the cinematography which at parts worked quite great, but most of the time was quite basic. This movie is kind of special also because it helped to influence the slasher genre which became hugely popular during the 80's. Sergio Martino is not as big in giallos as for example Argento, but still I'd put him up there with the best of them and this movie is only one proof of his greatness.
79%

Keep your clothes on or you might end up dead

Strip Nude for Your Killer (1975)

This is from the sleazier side of giallo's, but it's actually not a bad thing. Giallo fans tend to bash this for being too sleazy for a giallo, but still it has all the right elements of a good giallo, it's just spiced differently. And that spicing is what makes this quite special. Like the name suggests there's tons of nudity and sex in between the knife swinging and sometimes during it as well. The story is quite idiotic as it's in most of the giallo's, but as usual it doesn't matter at all as you don't really even care about it. The cast is quite ok, Edwige Fenech and Femi Benussi surely didn't make matters worse. What I loved about this was the sheer insanity of it all, I mean on one side it's a proper beautifully shot giallo, on the other side it's a sleazy sexploitation fest and if that wouldn't have been enough it also manages to be a trashy fun ride that's at points so over the top it's hilarious. So basically you get three exploitation genres in one weird package. First it scares you to death in a stylish way, then it excites you with plenty of beautiful ladies and then it cracks you up with hilarious morally incorrect comedy. So what's not to like? Well it's not perfect of course, at parts it tends to get a bit tedious, but luckily there's plenty of comebacks as well. For fun sleazy exploitation fans this is a must see, but for giallo fans it might not be the best choice.
75%

Yellow on yellow done by the master of yellow

Giallo (2009)

Giallo is Italian for yellow, but it's also a genre of horror film which characteristics are stylish camerawork with unusual music and extremely long murder sequences with sometimes slow motion footage. Dario Argento is, or at least was, the master of giallo's, his earlier works are true definite genre classics. So when he gets to direct a script that sounds like a homage to all of the giallo classics with a fairly large budget and a very solid actor, Adrien Brody, starring it, every giallo fan should be jumping with joy. Well unfortunately the main emotion among the fans was probably fear of what the outcome will be. At least it was for me as for the last 20 years Argento has made a mixed range of movies mostly from bad ones to the absolute garbage. Seemed like the master had lost his touch, or maybe it was just that he wanted to try to do some conventional horror with quite bad results. Surely he can still return to his level of brilliance where he was with the genre he helped to define. Unfortunately not. First of all what was good in this movie. Adrien Brody does a solid job with the dual part he has and is the carrying force of the movie when everything else fails. The rest of the cast isn't anything special, but do a fairly ok job none the less. The script is a bit too corny at parts, but still in the company of it's kind, it's not bad at all. Sure the idea of a man with a liver disease that turns his skin yellow running around in a taxi killing young women in a movie like a giallo is a bit over the top in "yellow". But then again it has all the right ingredients in there so it didn't bother much. What really did bother was that Argento is completely lost in the world he himself helped to create. Apart from the name of the movie, and of course the color of the killer, there's not much giallo in this one. The visual style is very straight forward, being even quite documentary like at parts and that's definitely not what giallo's are all about. The music is like a stock horror movie music, another thing that's definitely not from the world of giallo's. The murder sequences are somewhat typical, but without the visual and audio style they lose all their effect and just become numbing. At the beginning there were a few shots that made me believe there is hope for the movie, but it crashes and burns soon after. As a conventional horror movie this is decent, a bit below average but not a horrible effort as Adrien Brody and some good parts of the script manage to hold it together when things go wrong. But as a giallo, it's unfortunately the worst giallo ever made and thus one point. I really beg that Dario Argento would just retire from film making and let his legacy live it's own life. I mean I absolutely love the older Argento movies and really adore his style in them, but his new movies are just pissing on the old ones and while doing that also on me as a fan of them.
19%

Horror in the theatre

Stage Fright (1987)

Michele Soavi should know his giallos, being the assistant director to the maestro himself Dario Argento before wandering off to do his own movies. This is his first feature movie and surely enough it shows that he has the style quite well in hand. So the style of the movie is surely not the problem, it's pretty much everything else. The cast is quite horrible, well the dubbed english audio might have something to do with it also, but still the cast felt quite wooden. The story was a bit too stupid to help the enjoyment either. Don't know why they thought it's good to show the killer right from the start. Kinda misses the whole point of a "whodunnit", guess the director was trusting his visual style to keep the interest up. But the thing is that you know who the killer is and you see that the people "trapped" in the theatre are complete idiots as they can't get out so there's not much to get excited about. Still the killer wants to wear a huge owl mask, even though everyone already knows who he is. Guess it's just for the style then. Sure the style was fine and the movie has it's moments but it's a bit too idiotic to keep the interest up throughout it.
30%

You better watch out for Santa

Christmas Evil (1980)

Well christmas is coming so I'll watch some different kind of christmas movies. This Troma classic tells a story about a man whose images of Santa Claus get a harsh kick as a child when he witnesses Santa having sex with his mother. He gets obsessed about Santa and starts to act as one himself. The movie is more like a look into this mans life who is slowly slipping into insanity. Even though it's a slasher and it's made in the wake of the slasher classics of late 70's, it's not a typical slasher as the killing doesn't start untill the end third of the movie. First 50 minutes we watch the man slowly losing his mind. Brandon Maggart does a pretty good job at portraying this deranged man and that's good as the beginning of the movie is quite boring so at least the lead is working. At parts it's so bad that it's actually funny, but at parts it actually manages to raise some thrilling emotions. The part with the mirror is quite brilliant and the ending is quite surprising to say the least. So at parts it worked great but as a whole it's a bit uneven to keep the interest up.
51%

Mommy's boy

Maniac (1980)

This movie has a very bad reputation and I have no idea why. People tend to categorize it as just another ultra violent slasher or as an exploitative gore fest. Sure it is shockingly graphic in violence, but the main thing here is not the blood and guts, it's the killer himself. I see this as a psychological movie, kind of like a peek inside the head of a mad man. The man lives in a limbo, the pain drives him to kill, only to come back home feeling regret for what he did, that leads to more pain and the circle goes on. That's actually nothing new to slashers or serial killer movies, but this time the focus is solely on the man. The police or the usual opposing force of good is nothing but a glimpse on a TV screen. So Joe Spinelli, the actor portraying this monster has plenty of time to bring his character out. And he sure does it. One of the most convincing psychopat roles I've ever seen. And that's what this movie needed as it doesn't exactly shine out on other parts. It's made quite cheap and apart from the quite graphic effects everything has that poor quality printed on them. But it doesn't matter as the main point is delivered with a big punch. It's a nihilistic story about a monster of a man who is so repulsive it almost makes you sick, but still he is a human and that's scary as hell.
86%

The art of dying - two giallos from the master

Suspiria (1977)

One of my all time favourite horror movies and a true genre classic. The mood in this one is just unbeatable. It's beautiful and horrifying at the same time with a constant suspense of something bad lurking around. The story is quite basic and actually it seems borrowed straight from another movie by Argento, Deep Red (1975), only the setting has changed. But that doesn't matter as in Argento's movies the camera tells much more than the script. The visual storytelling is this movie's strongest part and makes it a masterpiece in it's class. The music from Goblin only boosts the surreal vision. Simply perfect.
100%



Opera (1987)

Many people say that Argento's career started to go downhill from Suspiria (1977). I don't fully agree with that as even though he of course couldn't top Suspiria (1977) but he still made a couple of great movies. Sure they had a bit of a recycled feel to them but I personally think this is the movie which marked the end of the master and after this started the downhill to the crappy nonsense he's doing nowadays. Anyway this time as usual the story is not the strongest point of the film. An opera singer is stalked by a killer who kills everyone in contact with the young woman. But again the camera tells the real story and some of the scenes are just simply mesmerizing. I actually felt quite sad after seeing this again as the movies the maestro has done after this are from bad to absolute garbage. Last of it's kind from Argento and a brilliant movie in it's own right. Definitely a must see for anyone even a bit into the world of giallos.
90%

A nightmare of a remake

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Another horror movie franchise that gets recycled. And again, they should have just left it alone. Lets start with the main man Freddy, when this movie was still in production I was looking forward of seeing Jackie Earle Haley as Freddy as I thought he could be a good choice. Well unfortunately I was wrong. His deep nasal voice sounded like he had a bad case of a flu. The lines he was given were simply awefull and the great one liners the old Freddy used to shoot around were just too corny even for this character. The rest of the cast were not a bit better, actually even worse, mere posers. So not good thus far, what about the story then? Well, there was a nice new twist to it, but I think it wasn't used good enough to bring new life to the movie. And what really amazes me is the lack of imagination on the dream sequences. I mean the only reason I could think of to make a remake out of the original would be to update the dream sequences to a bit more modern standards and a fresh surreal vision. But no, it's the same crap as in the sequels. So this movie fails in every aspect it could have even tried to be on par or even better than the original. Waste of time and money.
10%

I usually go through the rest of the movies in the franchise in cases like this, but as it's been more than 10 years since I last saw any of the sequels and not really in the mood to watch them again any time soon, I'll just review the original here. The sequels were very uneven from what I remember, 3 and 4 were somewhat ok, but the rest were just awful.



A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

A classic already and not without a reason. It was quite original when it came out and the horror is not the nowadays so typical cheap scares, but at points even quite good tension. Certainly not the best horror movie ever made, but it has it's well earned place near the top of the list. If there's actually someone out there who hasn't seen this yet, go watch it.
84%

Not another teen slasher?

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (2006)

Didn't have my hopes up for this one as I thought it would just be another teen slasher. Well a teen slasher it was, but I have to say I was a bit surprised, in a positive way. The plot is the same story we've seen in hundreds of these kind of movies, group of teenages go to a remote location, drink, do drugs, have sex and die. Of course there's a little twist at the end, but otherwise it didn't bring anything to the old story. I guess that's not even the point, the plot is what it is and the horror is the driving force of these kind of movies. And that's what surprised me, the horror worked rather well in this one. Loved the idea of showing less but using sound effects to increase the terror. These days when you've seen pretty much every horrible thing on movies, your own imagination still creates the most terrible images. Even thou it's not exactly used as effective as it could have, it still works quite well on those few scenes. Don't get me wrong, it's still a bloody movie, but it's not a gorefest. Also liked some of the camera tricks, some of them worked really well and gave a fresh breath of air to the stereotypes. Then again others were a bit out of context and thus didn't work too well. The cast was ok, not really a triumph of the art of acting, but still they didn't make you laugh unintentionally. All in all a positive surprise, but sadly in the end it's just another teen slasher.
65%