I lost a bet last year and
my "payment" was to watch a movie selected by my friend. As
he knows I hate Adam Sandler, he chose this movie right here and yesterday was the day to pay. Well torture wouldn't even start to
describe the uneasy feeling I had throughout this movie. Not only
does Adam Sandler play himself, he also plays his sister and a
freaking parrot to boost. So he's in pretty much every single shot of
this movie. Never before has 90 minutes gone as agonizingly slow.
This was supposed to be a comedy, but I think I smiled once and cried
out of pain quite a few times. What I smiled at was a scene were this
adopted Indian kid hits Sandler in the face, I didn't smile at it
because of slapstick comedy what it was most likely intended to be, I
liked it because I thought the kid tried to slap some sense into him.
I could hear him saying “You seriously think it's funny to tape
stuff in me? Fuck this shit!” That was the only small pleasure
between the torture, I guess you could compare it to having a small
twig stuck under your fingernail that is annoying you and then having
a mad torturer slowly pulling your fingernails off one by one,
eventually he will get the one with the twig also. You can judge
yourself whether it's worth it or not.
The biggest question
this movie rises is what the hell is Al Pacino doing in this one? Why
is he so desperately trying to destroy his career by taking part of
something as bad as this? All I can think of is for the money. And
speaking of the money, what I found most shocking was that this movie
cost 79 million and it almost made it back. More entertaining movie
would have been to pile up all the cash, put a picture of Adam
Sandler, or just the guy himself to be honest, on top of it and light
it up in fire. I'd pay to see that. However, there's something good
about this movie as well, it made me think about my rating system. I
have given six 0's in the past and I would rather watch any of those
movies than to suffer this one again. Well except maybe for Blooded(2011) which would have to take a long and incredibly tough fight with this
one to find out which was really the worst movie of 2011. And to be
honest I couldn't care less, I'd be happy to share that title with
both of them. As Al Pacino says at the end "Burn this. This must
never be seen by anyone!" I agree with him. The movie makes us
believe he was talking about his commercial, but I think he actually
saw the finished movie and was commenting on that. At least I
seriously hope so.
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